Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[pusielover]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Let me post here stories recently which I sort of involved or advise others...

Disclaimer - the story may relate a certain person but no name mentioned and just for discussion sake as case studies.

Story 1

A Singaporean married a Viet gal and have a baby after 3 years of marriage. Now the girl already has PR approved. Recently due to disagreement with MIL the wife run away and stay with friends. The disagreement is always about money. Wife working earning 1.5k per month and need to send 1k back to her mother in Vietnam who build a house base on loan.

This guy cannot speak tieng viet and no way to talk to his MIL not to pressure his wife to send so much money. Also never really spent enough time to learn Viet culture and understand viet gals before marriage.

I had given some advice and not sure what else I can advise him more.

next story to be continue.

Good job bro! Story 1 already attracted so many comments.
Let's continue with your story 2. I am sure it will be as interesting

[KangTuo]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

hubby sandwiched between mum and wife...tough to resolve amicably...

you have good advice to solve this...

No good advice...
Google wife vs mother lor. Alot of stuff written on the topic

No good answer here as well
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=740619

"By the marriage, each one leaves its mother and father for creation of couple and of the family. It is the marriage."

[pusielover]

Originally Posted by KangTuo

No good advice...
Google wife vs mother lor. Alot of stuff written on the topic

No good answer here as well
http://forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=740619

Need no complicates matter, I always tell/remind my Wife I love my mil as though my own mum. And in turn she did the same to her mil. I don't gv my mum 1000$ per month so she does the same lol... Hv Learnt to appreciates while we still have the time, when they are gone our conscience are clear without any regrets. 家有一老如有一寶

[KangTuo]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

hubby sandwiched between mum and wife...tough to resolve amicably...

you have good advice to solve this...

Maybe can read and try understand this... 4th commandment
http://rediscover.archspm.org/belong...o-family-life/

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by pusielover

If hus mum is part of the household, it's not wrong for her to demand her dil to be responsible for the household expenses. If dil is not working, fair enough, but now she's working she can't simply don't pay her portion n donate most of her income to blood suckers. Meaning she's donating at the expenses of her mil/hus
Daughter has the reponsilities to take care of he own Mother but not at the mil expenses...

To any foreigner wife who married to Singaporean, dun expect wife to contribute to hubby household expenses...if you expect then you will likely force her to abandon you...

Originally Posted by pusielover

Even understand their culture
Many other unforeseen problem arise in whoever or whatsoever we married lol! How to predict what will happen? Got to solve when it comes...No wonder many single sillyporean says they are not ready for marriage. In that case we will Nv be ready

too late to talk about understand culture...already married with kid...

Originally Posted by damong777

Dun understand the guy...if not prepared to get married, better dun. If wife pr Liao, later divorce. Messy.

Dun understand their culture must dun involve in a relationship

many who dun visit Vietnam and never spend time to learn to learn their culture will not understand...I taught you to learn and observe...you did and knew what to do which is easy...

I tried not to dominate the reply...rather you guys suggest and I read...maybe can learn something which I had not heard before...

Discuss story 2 another day...plenty of time

[pusielover]

Originally Posted by pusielover

Need no complicates matter, I always tell/remind my Wife I love my mil as though my own mum. And in turn she did the same to her mil. I don't gv my mum 1000$ per month so she does the same lol... Hv Learnt to appreciates while we still have the time, when they are gone our conscience are clear without any regrets. 家有一老如有一寶

Point to add: we treat them as treasures bcoz they love us.
Not treating us like shake money tree...
And don't give a damn, borrowing unnecessarily, bundling their offspring.

[damong777]

I just feel that marrying a foreigner regardless of nationality, need to understand them, their lifestyle and culture.

This from having been married to malaysian and having a vn gf.

Thanks to h88 and some senior bros, manage to work out what I want or what i would consider in a relationship

1) a long distance relationship is tough to maintain even I fly every month to vn (major break up issue sometimes though been 1.5 yrs ady)
2) trust level of both parties. This would extend to marriage. Once got bad record tough to change perception
3) how long can the gal to marry or status quo
4) what promises were made? Dun just make promises for sake of kcing gal. Will come back bite you in ways u cannot imagine

If you never consider all these, just take most simple way. Dun commit yourself and save yourself pain. Just go enjoy and fnf.

Life is simple sometimes. It is we who make things difficult for ourselves. Most impt we should be happy firstly.

Seen and heard too many cases where sing men are not prepared mentally for marriage to a vb.

Just my thoughts. Do feel free to disagree.

[damong777]

Originally Posted by pusielover

Point to add: we treat them as treasures bcoz they love us.
Not treating us like shake money tree...
And don't give a damn, borrowing unnecessarily, bundling their offspring.

Is the foundation of the relationship where if it starts correctly for both parties it would stand firm. No relationship has no up and down really depends on the foundation of the relationship

[pusielover]

Originally Posted by damong777

Is the foundation of the relationship where if it starts correctly for both parties it would stand firm. No relationship has no up and down really depends on the foundation of the relationship

Foundation as in length of time spend together b4 marriage? Dating for years b4 marriage doesn't guarantee blissful enternally, where "love at 1st sight" not necessary can't last a life time.
Many match made n got into marriage in a short period of time in the past, present n definitely in future can last too.

[pusielover]

Scam marriage spoil market
https://sg.yahoo.com/news/scam-marri...110602651.html

[milfmilf]

Husband must be weak financially
Wife got work can settle hers and her viet family $$ needs, thats good.
Husband just take care house and kid

But wife money if build house for mother .... hmmmm

[Hurricane88]

Originally Posted by pusielover

Foundation as in length of time spend together b4 marriage? Dating for years b4 marriage doesn't guarantee blissful enternally, where "love at 1st sight" not necessary can't last a life time.
Many match made n got into marriage in a short period of time in the past, present n definitely in future can last too.

I suggest you follow KT story...his wife waited 5 years for him...now they have 1 pair of lovely kids...

KT story is classic inside here...go read his number 2 and 3 at once upon a time...

[milfmilf]

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[eddy72]

i have a friend who solve every issue simply by whatever outcome that

benefit him the most.. " because he is the meaning of ultimate " self-center"..

between wife n mum, he choose wife.. what the logic? his wife will stay with

him until he die, which his mum sure lose..

fyi.. " his wife will rather die than leave my friend "..

regarding $$$$ issues, I have learn 1 thing.. if small $$$$, use $$$$..

bo problem liao..

if big $$$$$$? then, the issue is not about $$$$$$..

[KangTuo]

Originally Posted by shysaint

Free come out Makan with our family ok?

meeting up with friends is one thing that is so difficult to do these day
everyday finish work go home in evening, all concentration is on my son.
weekend is family time with my parents. Need to bring my children over to them for play time.