Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[Hurricane88]

Retired teacher, Mr. Wang and his wife plan for a far trip. They were afraid that if a thief broke into the house, the house would be maliciously damaged by rummaging through boxes and cabinets and could not find money, so he put one thousand ringgit on the table and left a note for the thief: Feel sorry! Thanks for your hard work! We are B40, we live on a little pension, and we don’t have any cash at home. You finally came here, I am afraid that you might wasted your time, so I set aside RM1000 for you as a working trip. *** If you wish to expand your harvest, the eighth floor opposite my house is the chairman of Petronas, the seventh floor is the general manager of Petonas, the sixth floor is the Minister of Finance, the fifth floor is the house of the former Minister of Defense, and the fourth floor is the UMNO Property Management Committee Office. They have plenty of cash and in case of theft, they will never report to police. I wish you a fruitful harvest!
A week later, when Mr. Wang came home, he found that there was 100,000 ringgits in cash and a note on the table: Thank you teacher for your teaching, it was a late meeting, this mission was successfully completed and the harvest was fruitful, so I left 100,000 ringgit to express my gratitude. Please continue to teach in the future and keep providing information. grateful! grateful!
Note: Can you tell me where does BossKu live? 🙏

[Hurricane88]

A drunk man asks his lawyer,

“If I buy a bottle of alcohol from a legal Govt. approved shop, and my wife tries to stop me from buying/drinking,.....

is it possible to sue and send her to prison for ‘obstructing Govt. approved activity, and hindering tax collections?”

The lawyer is still wondering how did such a brilliant idea popped up in this drunkard's mind!!!
🤔 😳😂

[Samkieu]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

A drunk man asks his lawyer,

“If I buy a bottle of alcohol from a legal Govt. approved shop, and my wife tries to stop me from buying/drinking,.....

is it possible to sue and send her to prison for ‘obstructing Govt. approved activity, and hindering tax collections?”

The lawyer is still wondering how did such a brilliant idea popped up in this drunkard's mind!!!
🤔 😳😂

Nice joke. Thanks.

[DJota]

Thanks for all the nice jokes

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[byexiang]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Retired teacher, Mr. Wang and his wife plan for a far trip. They were afraid that if a thief broke into the house, the house would be maliciously damaged by rummaging through boxes and cabinets and could not find money, so he put one thousand ringgit on the table and left a note for the thief: Feel sorry! Thanks for your hard work! We are B40, we live on a little pension, and we don’t have any cash at home. You finally came here, I am afraid that you might wasted your time, so I set aside RM1000 for you as a working trip. *** If you wish to expand your harvest, the eighth floor opposite my house is the chairman of Petronas, the seventh floor is the general manager of Petonas, the sixth floor is the Minister of Finance, the fifth floor is the house of the former Minister of Defense, and the fourth floor is the UMNO Property Management Committee Office. They have plenty of cash and in case of theft, they will never report to police. I wish you a fruitful harvest!
A week later, when Mr. Wang came home, he found that there was 100,000 ringgits in cash and a note on the table: Thank you teacher for your teaching, it was a late meeting, this mission was successfully completed and the harvest was fruitful, so I left 100,000 ringgit to express my gratitude. Please continue to teach in the future and keep providing information. grateful! grateful!
Note: Can you tell me where does BossKu live? 🙏

Well done Mr. Wang!

[malaysiapig]

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[Eequalmc2]

Thanks to all who wrote the nice jokes.

[warbird]

WHOREHOUSE SUES CHURCH OVER LIGHTNING STRIKE

What an interesting turn of events in Mount Vernon, Texas.

Diamond D's brothel began construction on an expansion of their building to increase their ever-growing business.

In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the business from expanding --with morning, afternoon, and evening prayer sessions at their church.

Work on Diamond D's progressed right up until the week before the grand re-opening when lightning struck the whorehouse and burned it to the ground!

After the brothel burned to the ground by the lightning strike, the church folks were rather smug in their outlook, bragging about "the power of prayer."

But late last week 'Big Jugs' Jill Diamond, the owner/madam, sued the church, the preacher and the entire congregation on the grounds that the church ... "was ultimately responsible for the demise of her building and her business -- either through direct or indirect divine actions or means."

In its reply to the court, the church vehemently and vociferously denied any and all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.

The crusty old judge read through the plaintiff's complaint and the defendant's reply, and at the opening hearing he commented, "I don't know how the hell I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, that we now have a whorehouse owner who staunchly believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that thinks it's all bullshit."

[Samkieu]

Originally Posted by warbird

WHOREHOUSE SUES CHURCH OVER LIGHTNING STRIKE

What an interesting turn of events in Mount Vernon, Texas.

Diamond D's brothel began construction on an expansion of their building to increase their ever-growing business.

In response, the local Baptist Church started a campaign to block the business from expanding --with morning, afternoon, and evening prayer sessions at their church.

Work on Diamond D's progressed right up until the week before the grand re-opening when lightning struck the whorehouse and burned it to the ground!

After the brothel burned to the ground by the lightning strike, the church folks were rather smug in their outlook, bragging about "the power of prayer."

But late last week 'Big Jugs' Jill Diamond, the owner/madam, sued the church, the preacher and the entire congregation on the grounds that the church ... "was ultimately responsible for the demise of her building and her business -- either through direct or indirect divine actions or means."

In its reply to the court, the church vehemently and vociferously denied any and all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.

The crusty old judge read through the plaintiff's complaint and the defendant's reply, and at the opening hearing he commented, "I don't know how the hell I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from the paperwork, that we now have a whorehouse owner who staunchly believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that thinks it's all bullshit."

Thank you for sharing nice jokes.

[dCoV]

Originally Posted by dyelook

laughter bumps...

Haha very true bro. Love the darkness nowadays.

[ah rat]

________________

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[Hurricane88]