Sisters please respond

cleanfreak · #1 27-09-2010, 04:07 AM

My gf just broke off with me today. It's a long story.

We've been together for about 4years. I have to admit that I can be quite a male chauvinist at times and will scold her over small matters. Sometimes when we quarrel I can be very harsh on her. Recently I started going out with my friends quite alot and she wants to tag along but I ask her to find her own programs. We quarrelled once about it. past few weeks I've been neglecting her and going out without her while she goes out with her own friends.

One day she came back and told me that she's happier with her friends. She dreads coming home and seeing me as she doesn't know when I will quarrel with her again. Also for the past one year I've been in and out of jobs so she doesn't feel the sense of security from me. Happiness won't come without the sense of security. Until she told me her heart is hard.

We agreed on giving her sometime to cool down and try being together again giving ourselves a 2months period of time to try it out.

I know I have to start working and show her that I will be able to give her a sense of security and also change my bad habits. But really afraid she will still say no after all...

Just needed a channel to voice my thoughts. Thanks

Devil4U · #2 27-09-2010, 06:48 AM

if you really love her...treasure her and starts showing her with love.

big9n · #3 27-09-2010, 07:15 AM

SORRY i not girl but hey treasure her when she still yours!!!!

don't regret when she finally gone from you.

cleanfreak · #4 27-09-2010, 07:23 AM

I'm supposed to let her cooldown for awhile before we try to get back together again and give it a final try. But there's no promise from her that all will be well again even if I can change and show her that I'll work hard.

I'll still have to try and impress her though. But it's probably because we were living together and I believe living together before marriage would make us gradually take things between us for granted, sub-sonsciously.

Thanks for the encouragement.

big9n · #5 27-09-2010, 07:30 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cleanfreak

i'm supposed to let her cooldown for awhile before we try to get back together again and give it a final try. But there's no promise from her that all will be well again even if i can change and show her that i'll work hard.

i'll still have to try and impress her though. But it's probably because we were living together and i believe living together before marriage would make us gradually take things between us for granted, sub-sonsciously.

Thanks for the encouragement.

i know you try to impress her but the more you talk with less action is equal than never work hard at all.... Give her more freedom and space what she try to do while you mainly focus work hard for now on.... Hint her abit by abit to let her know you trying very hard now while she can see it.... Don't annoying her because it will bring more bad things up...... Don't worry about other guys as if she is yours mean yours!

good luck bro~

JoyJoy · #6 27-09-2010, 07:50 AM

Give her some time to breathe some air outside, in meanwhile improve urself to a better bf, prove to her u have changed..

*Dun juz say say n do nothing..Tis will make her more annoy

*

liberatte · #7 27-09-2010, 08:01 AM

Hey, get married, pop out some kids. I am sure thay can change everything.

hornyhead · #8 27-09-2010, 08:04 AM

bro,make her preganant,that way she cant escape.no matter wat hapen.

toyotavios · #9 27-09-2010, 08:15 AM

Girls just need you to spend time with her just like u wanted to spend time with her. Think about how two of you start this relationship... I guess it must be something that sweet enough to make her feel it worth to be treasured.

Life is not smooth, treasure what you have and treat it as a gift from HIM.

tattoohammer · #10 27-09-2010, 08:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JoyJoy

Give her some time to breathe some air outside, in meanwhile improve urself to a better bf, prove to her u have changed..

*Dun juz say say n do nothing..Tis will make her more annoy

*

i oso did the same lei but hor she is still angry with me lei...

JoyJoy · #11 27-09-2010, 08:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tattoohammer

i oso did the same lei but hor she is still angry with me lei...

Coz u deserve it mah

cleanfreak · #12 27-09-2010, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tattoohammer

i oso did the same lei but hor she is still angry with me lei...

bro your reply made me laugh.

thanks bros.

PepperO · #13 27-09-2010, 08:31 AM

Hi TS..

I'm sorry to put it this way, but as a woman, I do think you have been taking your gf for granted for way too long. For her sake, I thank God that she is doing something for herself.

Most people do not know this, but not all women need their men to be rich with the 5C's. What they really want is a man who is not complacent, who bothers to strive to be better, so that they can see a future with him.

Fair enough, you seemed to have hit a rough patch in your career.. but the way you treated her is inexcusable. You should be lucky that she agreed for a cool-off period and not a "this is it". Do something about your life - enrol for a course to upgrade yourself, take up a sport.. Instead of spending your money on drinking your life away, you can spend it more constructively.

All the best to you..

s4spec2 · #14 27-09-2010, 10:04 AM

i am also not a girl. but this is my point of view. eventually at the end of the day what a girl is looking for in a man is sense of security, ie financially stable.

period

Mr MCBB · #15 27-09-2010, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cleanfreak

My gf just broke off with me today. It's a long story.

We've been together for about 4years. I have to admit that I can be quite a male chauvinist at times and will scold her over small matters. Sometimes when we quarrel I can be very harsh on her. Recently I started going out with my friends quite alot and she wants to tag along but I ask her to find her own programs. We quarrelled once about it. past few weeks I've been neglecting her and going out without her while she goes out with her own friends.

One day she came back and told me that she's happier with her friends. She dreads coming home and seeing me as she doesn't know when I will quarrel with her again. Also for the past one year I've been in and out of jobs so she doesn't feel the sense of security from me. Happiness won't come without the sense of security. Until she told me her heart is hard.

We agreed on giving her sometime to cool down and try being together again giving ourselves a 2months period of time to try it out.

I know I have to start working and show her that I will be able to give her a sense of security and also change my bad habits. But really afraid she will still say no after all...

Just needed a channel to voice my thoughts. Thanks

I did not delete any of your comments/post as I felt that you had already taken the most important step of all - that is to recognize and admit your own shortcomings (which I had highlighted in RED)

The next most important step is - let her know you have realized those shortcomings and are sincere in not recommitting them in order to win her trust and confidence in the relationship my friend