Poodles warn Jane Austen inspired Netizens not to rock the boat

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Transmodified from hxxp://www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/don-t-spread-rumours-over/915548.html

PEASANTPORE: Poodles have exhorted Jane Austen inspired netizens against taking potshots at various Gestapo unit in the aftermath of the violence in Little India on Sunday night.

They said that in Asiatic societies, lowly peasants should shut their trap and wait for official propaganda to swarm the media. Adopting Ang Moh spirit of inquiry is 'Unasiatic' and unpatriotic. The spirit of inquiry only force the Poodles to be on their toes during to investigations, may generate paper work, and cause the larger community to question Poodle's ability to contain future riots.

Posting on their Facebook page on Monday afternoon, the Poodles also laid out some key propaganda to dispel rumors circulating online.

They said it was a fact that Poodles, learning from the Thais decided to play it safe by not firing any warning shots throughout the incident, and this embolden the mobs who decided to overturn and set at least 2 Poodle patrol cars along with other vehicles. The fact that the Poodles lost 2 patrol cars has shaken peasants' confidence in the once feared Gestapo force (who mainly prey on political dissenters).

Poodles cited Quantum Mechanics and claimed they resolved the situation and had it under control within an hour by allowing the mob to burn and lay waste to the streets to vent their frustrations.

This is followed by a subtle warning that any peasants who write long prose like letters poking fun at the Poodles' inability to contain the Mob will be 'processed' at an unspecified date thereafter.


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