girlfriend/wife who doesn't like sex at all

[xav1983]

You are never too young to start anew

[VanGogh]

Originally Posted by zoop

yes. nothing of that. i do all the painting, all the action. but i get nothing bad but just aim and shoot. and she will always want me to end it fast. and if she cum first, i get nothing. cannot continue. isn't it depressing. but im not ready to cheat on her yet...

Bro, I understand how u feel, I've gone thru that many years back when my ex-wife simply refuse sex for about 1 year, everytime I initiate sex, we'll end up quarelling... but I realised later that the reason is because she's so well fed outside , that she don;t need sex at home ... .. and i don't need to explain why i said "ex-wife"...

since you are firm that your GF is not having her own fun outside, and you want a serious solution, the only thing I can think of is to seek professional help... a psychologist maybe ??

[tungsten]

Imagine your daughter/sister tells you this, "My bf says that if I love him I will have sex with him.". What will you feel about this guy?

Seriously... if she is just your gf, then sex is really a bonus. She is not obligated to give you sex just because you are her bf.

If it is husband/wife relationship... suck it in... alot of us are facing the same problem. If after marriage sure got sex... I guarantee you that the sammyboy forum will lose at least half of its surfers.

[lightning]

Dear Bro,
I guessed that maybe she has experienced a painful past that made her fear of having sex. 9 years is a very long time with her and yourself if you truly love her. Many sacrifices and efforts takes to maintain this relationship.

After many years I realised that we do not only need to have one choice in life, unless you cannot live without it for very good reasons. Many years back my ex would leave me if I pursue my study oversea. But I choose to be with her and in the end better choice came to her and she left. God, I am so naive!

I came to realised that to men, our career is everything and without it we do not have the pleasure, respect and every other things in life. Back then given me a choice, I would opt for oversea study and get a good career. With a promising career, we will have wide ranges of choices including women.

For myself, why do I find find a wife who is able to take care of my family life and I also do need to have a sextifying life. If not, I do not need a wife at all. I would look out for other women who can truly make my a life a happier one, if not more exciting one. I would not succumb to threats of asking me to look out for another one. Convince her to look out for other guys who do not have sexual needs at all. I think I would give her a cold shoulder and let her think, if the results still maintain not optimistic. I will hunt for better choice whom I will be happier with.

Ultimately, I do not want do take golden horse back home which i cannot ride comfortably.

[ttttaann]

My 2 cents worth. It's better to be loved then to love.

I think the reason is that u love her too much to let her go. It's high time to do so. If as Ur gf not much sex, then if become wife equals no sex. Think. Normally when as bf gf, there I'd normally alot of sex. But after marriage, with so many commitments, work, home, kids, etc. Lagi no time for sex or less sex.

Think hard bro, can you live without it?

[lightning]

Originally Posted by tungsten

Imagine your daughter/sister tells you this, "My bf says that if I love him I will have sex with him.". What will you feel about this guy?

Seriously... if she is just your gf, then sex is really a bonus. She is not obligated to give you sex just because you are her bf.

If it is husband/wife relationship... suck it in... alot of us are facing the same problem. If after marriage sure got sex... I guarantee you that the sammyboy forum will lose at least half of its surfers.

Of course we won't put it in this way, rather sex is part and parcel of a relationship and marriage. Of course it is better to be loved, but seriously do you guys wanted to enjoy a normal, healthy sexual life with you partner? It will be a BIG LIE, if you do not want a good sexual life at all. Genetically, males are born horny and it is normal to enjoy sex for a loving couple. When marriage comes, I will try to spice up my sex life. During marriage life, due to stress that I cannot maintain a healthy sexual life, at least i had my fill before marriage and at the initial stage of marriage, I will try my best effort to maintain a healthy marriage and sexual life down the road, if not at most I may go for my ECA.

But first, let me enjoy life while I can, before settling down. Last but not least, It is also important to find a right partner who can take care of you and family. Also it is even better that she gives you minimal or no problems when living together.

When comes to sex, I think you could try to go for oversea holiday with her and make her happy first. Then slowly coax and entice her... if all these still fails, you make your own decisions.

[manny]

Zoop.. My hb was like ur gf.. The difference is after i've talked to him... He jus changed overnight!! Some bros here gave me gd solutions and i sort of gave him a cold shoulder.. After talking to him abt my needs n unhapiness, it probably made some sense to him and tat nite when he azked for it, i gave him a cold shoulder... Tat also prob let him feel hw it's like to be rejected wheb u uper hav feel for sex... Subsequent nites, we jus totalli enjoyed ourselves when kids r aslp... U r nt married yet. I can imagine when u 2 got married wif kids, ur wife (gf) will prob b too bz wif kids than care Abt ur needs.. Tats v sad u knw??

[hun2ter]

Bro

GF and wife got a lot of difference

you must tell us gf or wife

[owl888]

Bro TS, may b u can temporarily separate from her for say 3mths to pursue each other's new destiny. If after 3 months both still fail then I believe she'll treasure u more & sex portion will b more accomodating.

But of course tis would take some risks as either party may ended another new outlook in life. Of course no risks no gain....my humble 2 cents!

[lightning]

Originally Posted by manny

Zoop.. My hb was like ur gf.. The difference is after i've talked to him... He jus changed overnight!! Some bros here gave me gd solutions and i sort of gave him a cold shoulder.. After talking to him abt my needs n unhapiness, it probably made some sense to him and tat nite when he azked for it, i gave him a cold shoulder... Tat also prob let him feel hw it's like to be rejected wheb u uper hav feel for sex... Subsequent nites, we jus totalli enjoyed ourselves when kids r aslp... U r nt married yet. I can imagine when u 2 got married wif kids, ur wife (gf) will prob b too bz wif kids than care Abt ur needs.. Tats v sad u knw??

I agreed that cold shoulder treatment should work, but I suspected that she might have a phobia

[manny]

ya.. lightning bro... forgot who gave me this solution.. but realli thanks to him... guess guys cant realli take it when left high and dry rite? have feel but cant.. and gals can feel tat way too.. i hate it when my hb jus fell aslp when i need it.. feels like giving him a punch.. but didnt la.. sigh~
i hope zoop gf is not like wat some bro's told me.. maybe sianz already.. maybe outside has another 1... maybe tired??

[elong]

eat enough lao, no appetite

[lightning]

Originally Posted by manny

ya.. lightning bro... forgot who gave me this solution.. but realli thanks to him... guess guys cant realli take it when left high and dry rite? have feel but cant.. and gals can feel tat way too.. i hate it when my hb jus fell aslp when i need it.. feels like giving him a punch.. but didnt la.. sigh~
i hope zoop gf is not like wat some bro's told me.. maybe sianz already.. maybe outside has another 1... maybe tired??

Muahahaha... but he is the type who does not eat outside
At least dealing with guys is easier than dealing with ladies who are less sexually active.

[manny]

ya.. v true.. guys probably easier to ermm..manipulate.. sorry bros.. tats wat i think abt my hb.. lol..
gd tat zoop is a faithful guy.. wont eat outside la.. the gf shld appreciate him..

[k3lvin123]

Brother i pity u as i had similar experience when i was in the army. got this x gf, u know army leh siong siong siong book out once a week damn horny mah, she nv give damn peh ceh one leh so i broke out with her