Having issues getting over girlfriend’s sexual past

[Dumbfolded]

Dear TS

Every man and woman have their own sexual past. like you said its PAST. If you really love this woman i suggest you sit down and think and get it out of your head. Be grateful that your gf come clean with you. she is being honest you have to accept her including her past. You are still young if this relationship doesn't work out, next time when you met a new gal and you know you do not want to know about her past especially sexual history then dont even ask even she tells you just stop her nicely. because there are some truth that you cant handle so why even bother to know in the 1st place.

Good luck

[phbh]

To have a past, then will there be future. If your girlfriend past is all about happy relationship and a happy life, do you think there is chance for you to enter her life? She may have a loving BF that love her as much as you do.

You want a girl with no past record? Start to nuture them when they are born, not complain here and there. No one is perfect.

As long your gf is true to you now, why matter about the past? To show your temper because of her past, which are no fault of hers, is very childish of you. Grow up man.

To even think that you are more clean than her becos your 1st is given to her, is even more childish and naive.

You can throw more temper at her for her past, and you will lose her for good. and i hope she does, so guys like you can be taught a lesson.

And when your next gf despise you, you will know how your current gf feel.

Life is short,be happy.

[zanketon]

just happen to see a nice quote so decided to share with you.

"A good relationship is when someone ACCEPTS your past, SUPPORTS your present & ENCOURAGES your future."

By don know who

[huhu123]

go and get yr fucking ass poke by a guy u are a piece of shit.

U dun deserves her and go and castrate yourself u dun deserve to be called a man.

[ZombieMania]

1. Nothing. Learn to live with it or without her

2. yes, think why you love her.. or whether you really love her

3. refer to 1&2 + learn kama sutra will help

4. Depends on what you mean by "others". She is in a relationship with you... for a reason? also refer to 1&2

5. if you have a virgin fantasy... get a child bride (Afghanistan, India, Bangladesh, Romania, Cambodia and Vietnam are options for it) or be a priest! that way, no one will arrest you... and some people in Italy will hire lawyer for you

Originally Posted by eSSence06

cont...

My questions are:

1) What can I do to get past her past bisexual activities?

2) Is there anything I can work on so as to not be so hurt by my girlfriend’s sexual encounters?

3) What must I do to get the images out of my head so that I can just focus on her and myself?

4) How can I get over her loving others before me?

5) I don’t know whether or not her last boyfriend took her virginity or not and while it would devastate me if he had, I feel like I have a right to know. Does what they did constitute losing ones virginity or not?

Any help at all would be immensely appreciated. Thank you so very much!

[sane]

Is this real story in the first place

[herodieyoung]

everyone has a past.....who doesn't!

[Refylk]

Hey TS, if you really love her, you have to accept her for who she is...

Besides nowadays I think it's hard to find very 'pure' girls, even church goers are not as innocent as they seem to be.

[Schnitzer328i]

My questions are:

1) What can I do to get past her past bisexual activities?

2) Is there anything I can work on so as to not be so hurt by my girlfriend’s sexual encounters?

3) What must I do to get the images out of my head so that I can just focus on her and myself?

4) How can I get over her loving others before me?

5) I don’t know whether or not her last boyfriend took her virginity or not and while it would devastate me if he had, I feel like I have a right to know. Does what they did constitute losing ones virginity or not?

Any help at all would be immensely appreciated. Thank you so very much![/QUOTE]

the answer for your questions :-

1) ask yourself if you yourself has been an angel !!!

2) yes..self service aka pcc helps..and its proven.

3) yes..dont look elsewhere except your didi and her valley while bonking..that should keep you focused for sometime atleast.

4) keep telling yourself "i am the first from the bottom" atleast 1008x a day.

5) she has the right to deny you the knowledge as much u reserve the right of not disclosing who you fantasize while pcc. whether what they have done constitute to losing her virginity is irrelevant.

and additional advise for you..get your head sorted out and get a life instead whining over the past and virginity.

The definition of virginity : A big issue on a small tissue

[porscheclub]

Son, go finish your NS first then build your career. 20 is TOO young to discuss about marriage.

Most of us don't know what kind of lifelong partner we want till after 30yrs old so you have at least a decade to date, party, pop cherries and learn to survive. When the kid comes, it's another new chapter. Go enjoy life first. Her past? Let go if there's a slightest hint of bother as it's a poison that'll kill the relationship ultimately. Good luck.

[aldof.hilter]

Dear TS,

The best thing is to break up with her because she deserves someone better, who loves her without looking to her past.

You're such an insecure young chap. Maybe because you have a small didi?

Oh no, pardon my language. I don't think you have a small didi. Because mine is small but I am not insecure like you.

Ahee.

[randyrockhard]

First of all, I think you sound insecure about your position within your relationship with her.

As we grow older, we would discover that sex isn't really the ONLY component which holds a relationship intact. It is important, but not the only one.

I don't know about you, but to me a healthy relationship must have 3 things: Respect, Friendship, and Passion. Sex is really just one tiny part somewhere in between.

Assuming that a 'relationship' is INDEED what you want by being together with her, then it may be a good idea to address your insecurities and start working on the other valuable things in a healthy relationship.

Let's address them, shall we?

First of all, always remember that in life there are always 2 things. One is, things that we can change, Second is, things that we can not change. Differentiate it clearly. Accept the things that you can NOT change, and improve the things that you CAN change.

Regarding her past/anything past/yes anything, including whether she had/had not had sex with that someone or many ones/yes, and that too whatever it is on your mind:
Understand that her past is what made the person she is today You didn't cause her past, you couldn't control her past, and you couldn't fix her past. Accept that and move on.

Regarding your hurt feelings:
Why do you need to feel hurt by someone's past? Why do you need to self-internalize her past and identify that as the cause of your hurting?

Can you see that it's not her past which actually caused your hurting. YOU are the one who hurt your self and no one else but laid the blame on her.

Regarding your inability to move on:
Once you improve yourself so much more, this insecurity would go by itself.

Regarding her bisexual activities:
What can you do? Well, assuming you like women, and since she indicated that she used to like women. If you could talk her into bringing into your activities, purely sexual of course... this could very well be serving for your advantage. But it has to be her, to be the one who choose which woman to participate in your act together.

Good luck

[thewildone]

TS, true story here.

Used to have an ex who told me about her past with guys from different races. It didn't matter to me. All I thought about was to out-do them with as many techniques, positions, lengths of time and locations (all over the world). Call me having a low-self esteem, but it gave me a chance to feel confident over those jerk-off ghosts of the past.

But the moment she started to get back to being chummy with one of her exes, I called it quits and moved on; I can tahan her past, but not her messing around in the present.

[justdifferent]

Originally Posted by eSSence06

I read a question that was similar to the one I have, but I did not believe it could fully be used for my situation. Both my girlfriend and me are 20 years of age. We have been together since July 2nd 2010, and it is June 2013. We were friends for many years before we started dating but due to both of us moving around we were not able to have a relationship. She is everything I ever wanted in a woman and I am so happy to have her in my life. I had no sexual interactions what so ever before I was with her, she is my first in everything. Unfortunately, I am not her first in many things, if anything at all, and that is very hurtful and distressing to me. When she was growing up her parents neglected and even abused her. She was molested on several occasions, but never by a family member. Her life has not been one of happiness and is full of past pains that plague her to this day. She never felt loved or cared about by anyone, and sought out relationships to fill this void. Her first sexual experience was with a female, they were friends and one night during a sleep over her friend put her hand down my girlfriends pants and began feeling around down there. My girlfriend said she did it back to her friend. She was bisexual for a while and dated a few girls, but never did anything for that kiss them. Though not often she claims. Her first sexual experience with a boyfriend was when she was 14 and the guy she was dating asked her to “touch him”, and so she did. She says she didn’t want to but did it to make him happy. In her next relationship she let him suck on her breasts and finger her, she touched him but while he had pants on so there was no contact with his penis.

...

Originally Posted by eSSence06

cont...

In her third relationship she also let him finger her and she gave him a hand job as well. In her last relationship she went out with this guy for 2.5 years and she really loved him. He was the first she gave oral sex to, and they did everything together. He fingered her; she gave him many hand jobs and lots of oral sex. She wanted to have sex and so did he, but she brought it up to him. They agreed and she claims that he only penetrated her a little bit before finishing, so she doesn’t believe she lost her virginity. He claims that every time they tried, which both him and her say was 3 times, that they had full intercourse but she swears that after that first time having failed, and the other two times they never got past being naked, none of the times they ever had full intercourse. I don’t know if she’s trying to protect me because she knows how bad it would hurt me if they actually did, or if she really didn’t have full on sex with him. I know her was able to penetrate her at least somewhat so I also have issues with whether she was still a virgin the first time we had sex.

I’ve told her many times that I just don’t know if I can ever get over all her past sexual activities. It bothers me greatly that she ever touched another woman, which happened more than once, and that she has kissed multiple girls. I have only kissed 3, including her, and I just feel inadequate knowing that she has kissed more than I have. Also all the sexual things she has done and have had done to her with other guys. I cant get the images out of my mind and it sometimes gets in the way of our sex life, if I start seeing or feeling things I can’t help but show it. One of the biggest problems I have is knowing that the woman I love and loves me back, the woman who I want to marry and make my wife one day, has loved other men. It feels like I am just one of three (she loved her last boyfriend and one other that I did not mention due to them not being sexual).

My questions are:

1) What can I do to get past her past bisexual activities?

2) Is there anything I can work on so as to not be so hurt by my girlfriend’s sexual encounters?

3) What must I do to get the images out of my head so that I can just focus on her and myself?

4) How can I get over her loving others before me?

5) I don’t know whether or not her last boyfriend took her virginity or not and while it would devastate me if he had, I feel like I have a right to know. Does what they did constitute losing ones virginity or not?

Any help at all would be immensely appreciated. Thank you so very much!

You've told us that she is everything you want in a woman and as a partner.

However, you've not said if you love her.

I'm guessing since you're so affected by it, you probably love her quite a lot.

From the way you talk about her, it seems as though you are completely in love with her.

My question to you is: are you?

If your answer is no, then the above points you've mentioned don't matter.

If your answer is yes, then it doesn't matter as well.

When you love someone completely and absolutely, you will accept and love every little thing about them. On top of this, the things you've mentioned are just things that have happened in the past.

If you fault her for something she's done before she met you, it is not her who is letting you down, but you who is disrespecting her.

[Goalie]

Originally Posted by sane

Is this real story in the first place

This is a fake story.

This is a clone out of 20 or more clones he created who had terrorized the indo-china threads trying to promote his sex websites especially the famous selling Virgins in Singapore which was exposed in the press.

He had posted in the HCM thread and we are zapping him.