If marriage is for companionship, why do married people still feel lonely?

[peekaboo]

Personal encounter. Firstly, companionship need the basic ingrediant which is time and focus on the time spend together. What most pple wan is do and spent as little time as possible to focus on accomplish as many things as possilbe. What bothers me is some pple got married and take it for granted tat the rest of the things will take care of itself. Just like in any other relationship. It happens.
Baiscally,I find it very difficult when the other party refused to listen and live in their own world. Its so frustrating.
Maybe the easy way out might require friends and family to do counseling. LOL

[wangzzz]

Depending which side of the coin you are,
There is a saying,

Marry for f*** ?

[hil169]

Originally Posted by wangzzz

Depending which side of the coin you are,
There is a saying,

Marry for f*** ?

Whoaa...whats your side of the coin?

[hil169]

So in the end, its abt compromise? And if compromise cant be reached, suck it up? We cant expect people to change. The only real change comes from within. What happens if your spouse isnt willing to change?

[bastardball]

Originally Posted by idreamyou

Me and wife had been together since puppy love.. Primary 5 haha .. break and patch all the way until ite..
After 2 years (NS) fate bring us back together again that was around 2011 and married at 2015 ..so far so good and we're getting our bto soon haha..

Good for you...but may i ask what are you doing in a sex forum?

[bastardball]

Originally Posted by hil169

So in the end, its abt compromise? And if compromise cant be reached, suck it up? We cant expect people to change. The only real change comes from within. What happens if your spouse isnt willing to change?

From my personal experience and observation with others...either you make yourself numb n have happy times outside...or make the big decision to get out....talking n reasoning is useless...trust me...when reasoning doesnt work...compromise doesnt take effect.

[hil169]

Originally Posted by bastardball

From my personal experience and observation with others...either you make yourself numb n have happy times outside...or make the big decision to get out....talking n reasoning is useless...trust me...when reasoning doesnt work...compromise doesnt take effect.

True. Each has their standpoint. Reasoning doesnt work if the fundalmentals of belief is not the same. If we cant reach to an agreement, maybe getting out is for the best for both parties.

[edwintantan]

Originally Posted by frankincense

That happened to me last night.

Hb asked me what was wrong, told him I felt neglected and whoaaaa, before I can finish my sentence, he'd defend defend defend and pointed the fingers back at me. Win already.

We've got 3 children too and no maid.

He said I could talk to him when he's doing the dishes. Hilarious. He wanted me to talk his back while he faces the wall? With his tablet (news channel on) right next to him, casual talk is fine but that wasn't the kind of talk that I wanted. I want to be asked how are things, how am I and all with 100% attention on me. Not when he's doing something else but he doesn't get it.

So yeah, after defending himself aggressively, I also sian. Why can't he just hear me out if he really wants to find out what was wrong?

I really think I should just go back to work.

Hi sis yes I agree go back to back .. dress up and get to more people

[alec]

I also agree.... Unless there isn't anyone else but you to take care of your kids.

Originally Posted by edwintantan

Hi sis yes I agree go back to back .. dress up and get to more people

[whatafish]

Originally Posted by hil169

Who are the married people feeling lonely here? Share why please.

The question is why must share ? Every situation is different . It is all up to the individual if he/she really wants to make the marriage work or not .

[6TRACY]

anyway,
1. gave up career,
2. bored him a child,
3. he flirts,
4. you forgive,
5. it goes on,
6. separated>divorce,
7. life goes on,
8. child is most impt, keeps my sanity.
9. btw, lonely & be alone are two diff situations.

TQ.

[peekaboo]

Originally Posted by 6TRACY

anyway,
1. gave up career,
2. bored him a child,
3. he flirts,
4. you forgive,
5. it goes on,
6. separated>divorce,
7. life goes on,
8. child is most impt, keeps my sanity.
9. btw, lonely & be alone are two diff situations.

TQ.

Sorry to see that also many ended like your case.
Seems like your pirolity keep changing over the 9 notes.
No hard feelings.

[frankincense]

Originally Posted by edwintantan

Hi sis yes I agree go back to back .. dress up and get to more people

We managed to work things out after our quarrel. Things are wonderful now. Hb got more attentive. Think he realized he was a little unreasonable after all.

As for me, I finally resumed my yoga classes so I'm pretty occupied now. No longer lonely. Having said that, if there's a job offer (decent offers of course), I'd definitely jump on it.

Dress up more? Working on it. Not sexy sort like those hot ladies here but decent enough.

[frankincense]

Originally Posted by alec

I also agree.... Unless there isn't anyone else but you to take care of your kids.

They still need me unfortunately. At least, I feel that they still do. Or maybe, it's the other way round. Haha!

[frankincense]

Originally Posted by 6TRACY

anyway,
1. gave up career,
2. bored him a child,
3. he flirts,
4. you forgive,
5. it goes on,
6. separated>divorce,
7. life goes on,
8. child is most impt, keeps my sanity.
9. btw, lonely & be alone are two diff situations.

TQ.

Hugs. Take care.