The Dark Side Manifests

[Dark Side]

Originally Posted by maxyis

great story bro.

Thanks Bro Maxyis.

There was one little detail I missed.

On the day before the actual 'O' level results were released,
I did receive this message on my pager:

"Why did u stop calling me?"

Again some background on pager.
Normally when people leave messages on pagers,
it is quint-essential that u identify yourself
and leave your name.

This is because unlike the sms and whatsapp,
if u did not leave yr name,
it was impossible to trace who was the person who left
the message in the first place.

The third party who typed the message into yr pager
could not be contacted,
but even if u contacted him or her,
he or she could not have known who was the person
who delivered the message.

It's like sending a bouquet of roses
to someone u like at her place
and leaving a card inside that said,
"From yr secret admirer."

That was how I felt.
The message I received on my pager had no name.

There is one other thing u need to know abt me.
I'm an introvert, so I had very few friends.
It was so in the past, and it is the same now.
I don't really open up.
So at that time, there was only one person
whom I kept calling, and it was none other than Diane.
As an introvert, it took a lot for me to keep
calling her for at least a hundred times
during the December holidays after the Titanic movie.
But once school re-opened in January the following year,
despair seized me as I finally realised that
Diane not only didn't like me,
she was actually disgusted with me.
So I gave up and stopped calling her.
I determined to bury my past to begin a new life.

I stopped calling her for 3 months,
but towards the end of March, just before 'O' results
were released, I received the above message.

Of course, it was possible
that my few other friends could have left this message.
When I stopped going to church towards the end of last year,
a few might have missed me.
But the message would have been,
"Why did u stop coming to church?", wouldn't it?

I finally suspected that Diane was the one who messaged me
when one evening many months later, she confronted me and asked me,
"Jayson, why did u stop calling me?"

Sorry everyone, this entry is again non-sexual.
I know I'm boring all of u,
but you know, it's not like I'm the best of writers ...
still trying to learn how to improve ...

[Dark Side]

It happened like this.
When I saw Diane again together with the second batch
of AJC students on 1st April, of course my desire for her
re-surfaced. Memories of my love and lust for her
were not only awakened,
they intensified right at the moment I saw her.

But being an introvert, I was also very hurt by her.
I was at the same time afraid that she would expose me
by going to the mike during assembly one fine morning
to announce to the entire AJC
that I touched her left breast on purpose the previous year.

So I stayed away from her for the next 6 months.
She was in the Science stream
while I was in the Arts stream,
and that was a good thing
cos we had to be in different classes.
Of course, our recess period was the same,
so I had to be sure that she was at the other corner of the canteen
before I found a seat at the opposite end to eat.
I also kept a lookout in case we queued up for the same store.
I usually ate chicken rice, and she usually ate Western food
which was a few stalls away,
but there were a few times when I found her
queuing at my chicken rice stall,
so I had no choice but to queue for her Western food.
Can u believe it, our stupid game lasted as long as half a year.
6 fucking months!

Finally after 6 months, during September
when Promotional Exams were coming very soon,
I very unluckily bumped into Diane
outside AJC school library.
Our eyes met, and she asked,
"Where are u going?"
She didn't ask this question in an angry way.
She had this upset expression on her face,
but from the way she asked, I don't think she was angry anymore.
But she still sounded upset in a strange way.
I looked at her for a few seconds.
She was still as gorgeous as ever, perhaps even more.
Her bosom, at 17 years of age, seemed to have exploded
ever since the last time I saw her.
It was literally bursting at the seams of her white laced bra
beneath the grey AJC uniform.
I was like thinking, "What the fuck did she drink? Milk?"
but I looked down at my shoes the moment
I caught myself glancing at her wrong place.
I wasn't going to let history repeat itself ...

"Er ... yeah ... hi Diane," I replied weakly.
I'm going ... um ... home I guess."

Which was a lie. I was intending to enter the library
to do some research and revise for my exams,
but since I knew that she was going into the library too,
I switched to Plan B.

"Oh, I'm going home too," she said.
"You're taking a train from Yio Chu Kang right?
So am I. Let's take a walk there together, shall we?"

Fucking hell. She decided to switch to Plan B too.

"Er ... ok." I didn't have enough time to think up a Plan C.
She had out-smarted me.
So we started walking together to Yio Chu Kang MRT in total silence.
It was very awkward. We used to be able to sustain a conversation so easily.
But now it's like, I was so guarded.
Finally she started talking abt frivolous things like
how her form teacher sucked,
how Economics was a pain in the ass
and how she wanted to drop Econs
to take only 3 'A' level subjects.
I nodded my head any number of times,
but couldn't find anything to say in response.
So there was awkward silence again after that.
This continued for another 10 minutes until we reached Yio Chu Kang MRT.

I lived near Commonwealth MRT while she lived near Clementi.
Even though we lived pretty near each other,
if u count the stops, it's nearer for me to take the south train
to Raffles Place, while she could reach home faster by taking the north train
to Jurong East and switch to East West line there.

"Ok, see u," I waved to Diane, trying to force an awkward smile.

"Hey, let's take the south line together," suggested Diane.
"It's about the same for me anyway.
We could talk a bit more, couldn't we?"

"No, maybe next time Diane? I'm kinda tired."

Which was another lie of course.
Truth was, she caught me unprepared.
I wasn't ready to talk to her,
and a plethora of feelings like anger, fear of rejection and of course lust
confused me. I had to get away from her.
I started walking away from her to the escalator
in the opposite platform when I heard her
calling loudly after me behind my back,

"Jayson, why did u stop calling me?
And why are u avoiding me?"

[Dark Side]

If only I had turned back to hug Diane right there and then
at Yio Chu Kang MRT station,
things might have been totally different now.

I now realise that.

Younger ones among u know that
we could have both taken the south train,
transferred to Circle Line at Bishan,
and alighted at Buona Vista to go our separate ways.
That would definitely have been the shortest cut for both of us.

But alas! If only Circle Line had existed in the late 20th century
instead of early 21th century,
I might have been able to grasp that very moment,
told her how much I loved / lusted after her,
taken her in my arms,
and hugged her all the way home.

Or maybe I shouldn't even have blamed
the non-existence of Circle Line.
What's the big deal abt taking the north line
together with her anyway?
It's only the difference of a few stops anyway.
I could have told her how much I missed her
while taking the advantage of the longer travel time
to fondle both her breasts
all the way from Yio Chu Kang to Jurong East and then to Clementi.
Nobody would have cared, she wouldn't have cared
and she might even be wanting for more of me
to go further all the way.

I now realise that.
But I was only 17 years old then.
What the fuck did I know then? Fucking hell.

So at that time, I hardened my heart,
ignored her pleas,
and took the escalator up the opposition platform,
leaving her standing there for God knows how long.

For the rest our first year in Anderson Junior College,
we did not talk to each other anymore at all.

Sorry guys. Still no sex. Haizzz ...

[iChop69]

pitching tent

[Dark Side]

Originally Posted by iChop69

pitching tent

Thanks Bro iChop69.

Fast forward to second year,
which was our final year at Anderson Junior College.

Diane and I continued avoiding each other
during the first half of the year.

I did very well for the Promotional Exams during my 1st year,
and continued to perform well in Mid-Year Exams for 2nd year.

Diane did ok for the 1st year Promos I think,
but when I saw her again in 2nd year,
I think she got kind of distracted
and didn't do so well for 2nd year Mid Year.
She was always seen with some guy
whenever I passed by her at the school canteen.
I didn't know their names,
but it should be either her classmates,
or some of her friends in Science Stream.
As I was still very introverted,
I had few friends in the Arts Stream
and none in the Science Stream,
except for Diane, if I could still consider her a friend.
Being extroverted, she had many friends,
both male and female.
What was different for her was in 1st year,
she usually ate with a mixed group of guys and girls.
In her 2nd year, she always ate with one guy.
And what's disturbing was, every day,
it would be a different guy.
Of course, given her good looks and
rapidly developing bosom,
it was natural for her popularity to blossom too.
But eating with a different guy every day?
That's 5 guys per week.
And sometimes, these 5 guys will be slightly different
from the 5 guys the previous week.
So after a few weeks, I completely lost count
the number of guys she ate with during recess.
Naturally I was upset and jealous,
but what could I do?

In my 1st and 2nd year,
I always ate alone.
Of course, there were girls in my class who wanted
to ask me out for recess, but I always rejected them
partly out of fear that Diane would pass by me
and tell the girl about the breast incident,
but also partly because I needed energy to
observe the different guys she ate with
out of the corner of my eye.

I notice that sometimes she would laugh especially loudly
at a joke that the guy supposedly told,
but she would also take a quick glance at me
and flash me a smile
before turning her attention back to the guy in question.
Being a bitch that she was, she was teasing me.
And I was totally helpless, since I knew that
it was my very own fault for rejecting her in the first place.

This carried on for half a year until
the time when school re-opened for the 2nd semester in July.
Diane walked right over to me during recess
without any guy with her and declared to me,
"The 'A' levels are coming soon, Jayson.
I have no more time for games.
I want u to help me with my Economics."

Now what the FUCK was that all about?

[tuikboo]

Bro continue please. Great story line. Cheers.

[tarma69]

I can so fully sympathize with what you went through, bro! Being an introvert myself too...

[Dark Side]

Originally Posted by tuikboo

Bro continue please. Great story line. Cheers.

Originally Posted by tarma69

I can so fully sympathize with what you went through, bro! Being an introvert myself too...

Thanks bros.

Of course I felt ridiculous that
after going on single dates with so many guys,
she at last had the cheek to come to me
as a last resort only because I was doing far better academically.

You might argue that these short 20-minute recess time meals
shouldn't strictly be considered as dates,
but still, you know.
What a flirt and a slut she was, right.

Yet I had no choice but to say yes to her.
What the fuck was wrong with my head?
Nothing wrong with the big head at all
since it made me one of the top Arts students in Year 1.
Needless to say, everything was wrong with my smaller head.
It's like, I only realised that I said yes to her
only after I said it.
My jealousy, anger, bitterness, fear all melted
before my Goddess' Almighty Presence.

[Dark Side]

A bit of background for the younger ones among u.

At 'A' level currently,
subjects are offered at H1, H2 & H3.
In my primitive time,
these were called 'AO' Level, 'A' Level and 'S' Paper respectively.

So 'S' Paper was a kind of equivalent to your current H3.
'S' Paper was only offered to those limited few
who did very well for any particular 'A' level subject at Year 1.

I took Literature, History, Economics
and Maths Syllabus 'C' as 'A' level subjects in Year 1.
As I did very well for Literature and History,
I was offered 'S' Paper for both in Year 2,
which I accepted.
So this makes my study schedule far more hectic than Diane,
who studied only 3 'A' level subjects in Year 2:
Physics, Economics and Maths Syllabus 'C'.
(She dropped Further Maths at the end of Year 1.)

I wasn't offered 'S' Paper for Econs,
but could at least manage a B plus or sometimes low A,
compared to Diane who consistently got C
until she dated too many guys in Year 2
and got a depressing D for Mid-Year Exams.
So at least I could still help her a bit.

But in order for me to give her tuition,
she had to wait for my 'S' Paper classes to end,
which was about 6.20pm,
and I would proceed to coach her in Economics
at the study corner
or one of the study rooms if they were available.

It was very tiring for me,
and although I did enjoy seeing her at the end of the day,
I wouldn't consider our tuition sessions as particularly romantic.

So from July onwards till the actual 'A' level exams in October,
we met at least twice a week, or sometimes thrice
if I realised she didn't manage to grasp
some of the concepts well enough.

I usually went down to business as I was already tired,
but she would be always beaming from ear to ear when she saw me.

I would always be thinking,
what the fuck did she do while waiting for me?
Took a nap at the library?
I never had the privilege of doing that.
My schedule was so packed.

I mean, of course when I was sitting right beside her,
sometimes I would take a quick glance
at her ever developing bosom
when I was sure she was looking
intensely at the Demand-Supply graphs.

On more than a few occasions,
the top button of her blouse would be unbuttoned
as there was no air-condition in my time.
It was so hot that sometimes I myself unbuttoned
my top button and started using my notes to fan myself.

Wasn't sure if she looked at me since there was nothing to see,
but the twin melons that were threatening to burst out
from her white-laced bra were definitely quite a sight to behold.

I remember thinking,
"What the fuck is this naughty little vixen doing?
She clearly knew that her breasts were developing
at such a rapid pace,
so why can't she buy a bigger bra?
She got no money is it?
Or is she doing this on purpose ...?"

Sorry guys I know this part is still a bit boring ...

[DBSBonk]

TS, pls continue

[Dark Side]

Originally Posted by DBSBonk

TS, pls continue

Thanks Bro DBSBonk.

And so the tuition went on without a hitch for July and August.
Term 3 common test came and went quickly,
and thanks to my effort,
Diane managed to get a low B for Econs common test,
which was a marked improvement,
while I maintained a comfortable A.

After that, the Prelims came on first in September
before the actual 'A' levels in October,
so every Year 2 was more or less panicking at that time.

As Diane had already dropped one 'A' level subject
which was Further Maths,
she could not afford to screw up any of her other
3 'A' level subjects.
She had no problems with Maths 'C',
always managing an A more or less like me,
but Physics was a problem and on bad days
she could only manage a D,
which was risky.
I did not take Physics so I could not help her with that.
But the help I gave to her Econs was absolutely crucial
if she wanted to go to a good university.
She knew it, I knew it.

So one fine day in September when we had a week left
before the Prelims, Diane grabbed my hand
and dragged me aside to a dark corner behind the AJC library.
Then she placed her hands on both sides of my shoulders,
looked at me straight in the eye and said,
"Jayson, it is absolutely essential that I get
at least a B for my Econs.
And you are going to be the one
to help me do it. There's no one else already.
My parents will kill me if I don't make it NUS.
My life is in your hands.
If I make it to NUS,
I will do anything for u.
Anything. Do u hear me?"

Anything? There are so many things I want from u, Diane,
I thought to myself, but don't dare to say.
I shifted uncomfortably
because I'd never been so near to her,
trying my very best to avert my gaze
from that pair of twin melons in front of me.
"Hey, relax man, Diane.
I'm not God u know.
Even I cannot be sure that I would ace Econs ..."

"Yes u can. Stop lying to me!" she interrupted,
moving even closer to me now.
The top button of her AJC blouse was loose,
so once again I saw what I shouldn't have seen.
"See how much I have improved after u started teaching me
for only 2 months.
U know what u should do after u graduate?
Become a lecturer.
You'll be awesome, just u wait and see.
As for Physics, I can only pray to God up there
although I haven't prayed to Him
for a long time already."

She sighed, "Say, why didn't I ask u to give me tuition earlier?
Such a pity."

She then turned, brushed aside her beautiful long hair,
and walked away from me to meet some other guy for lunch
at the school canteen.

Cos you were too busy flirting with other guys
and making me mad like now, I wanted to say.
But I didn't. Cos she had already disappeared from my sight.

[Myanmah]

Nice story, thank you

[tarma69]

Gosh, you are making me miss my JC days and my bosomy ex-gf too... Mai tu liao lah, Jayson! Help her score an A for Econs and bonk the shit outta her!!

[Dark Side]

Originally Posted by Myanmah

Nice story, thank you

Originally Posted by tarma69

Gosh, you are making me miss my JC days and my bosomy ex-gf too... Mai tu liao lah, Jayson! Help her score an A for Econs and bonk the shit outta her!!

Thanks bros for yr support.

Fast forward. The Prelims ended and we got our results.

This was what Diane got:

Econs: A
Maths 'C': A
Physics: D

This was what I got:

Econs: B
Maths 'C': B
History: A
Literature: A
History 'S' Paper: Pass
Literature 'S' Paper: Pass

On the day we received our report cards,
Diane rushed out of her classroom,
ran upstairs to where my classroom was,
and entered my class without permission.

Luckily one period had just ended
and we were waiting for the next
so there was no teacher in the classroom.

I stood up from my seat
when I saw Diane rushing towards me.
"Diane, you're not supposed to be here.
What are you ..."

I could not finish my sentence.
Diane gave me a tight hug right in front of all my classmates
and screamed, "I GOT AN A FOR ECONS!
I GOT AN A FOR ECONS! ALL THANKS TO U! YAY!!!"

My entire class stood up in laughter
to give us a standing ovation.

That was the kind of person Diane was.
Extroverted, eloquent, expressive and all that.
I was shy, introverted and averse to public displays of affection.
Looking at others hug made me squirm,
and even though I myself was now the victim of
a public display of affection, I squirmed too.
Sure, her breasts rubbed hard against my chest,
but I wasn't aroused in any sort of way
because I was simply too shocked to respond.
I just allowed myself to be hugged.

Moreover, to be honest,
I was a bit disappointed with my results.
She actually did better than me in 2 subjects,
including Econs, which was strange.
How was it possible that someone I taught
got A while I myself got B?
Well u see, on the day of the Econs Prelim exams,
I had my History 'S' Paper after that,
so I spent the night before juggling between 2 subjects.
I did remind Diane to study those few topics
which were essential in doing well for Econs,
but I myself did not have the time to
completely revise those same topics.

What was also sad was that not only did I get 2 Bs,
I also did not do well for both my 'S' Papers.
Let me explain. In 'S' Paper, there were 4 grades:
Ungraded, Pass, Pass with Merit and Pass with Distinction.
which was just another way of saying:
Fail, Grade C, Grade B and Grade A.

In other words, technically I got a 'C' for both my 'S' Papers.
All the rest of my peers who took 'S' Paper
scored at least a Pass with Merit, which was a 'B' equivalent.

Of course if I were to compare myself with Diane,
I still did better than her,
but what u must understand is the pressure
I was under at that time.
I was supposed to be part of the cream of the crop,
the elite among the elite.
How could I do so badly?
My 'S' Paper teachers all looked disappointed in me
when they returned me my exam scripts.
I cringed.
Of course, with these results,
I could still have made it into a local university like NUS,
but it might be difficult for me to get a scholarship
or enter some of the more challenging courses
like Law or Mass Communications.
I didn't come from a rich family
so a scholarship or two would definitely
come in handy.
And Diane was the obstacle which prevented me
from achieving my lofty ambition.
The time I spent giving her tuition twice or thrice a week
could have been used to improve my own grades.

In other words,
I was spreading myself too thin
without even spreading her legs yet.

[iJiBye69]

Nice story, camping for more!