Understanding Vietnamese Life Partner

[kingic]

Originally Posted by Golden question

1 thing to add is we cannot change them completely cos is in their blood already.Mine at least now will listen to what i say and also maybe i also change a bit of my character so she also give in a bit.Sometime she still stubborn but i just close one eye cos at least now she bother to listen to my explaination

my 1 is super stubborn, the head is hard like diamond, never want to hear the explanation. alway think she no do wrong thing. Do wrong also dun want change. have thing she misunderstand me, explain to her liao then say is i do thing make her misunderstand and she no do wrong. Now pregnant liao, more worse. every day coming home like going to hell.......

[volcano]

Originally Posted by kingic

my 1 is super stubborn, the head is hard like diamond, never want to hear the explanation. alway think she no do wrong thing. Do wrong also dun want change. have thing she misunderstand me, explain to her liao then say is i do thing make her misunderstand and she no do wrong. Now pregnant liao, more worse. every day coming home like going to hell.......

are u just married?

many of us here have already been through this path many years already.

and many of us have already realised that Vietnamese gals are born to be stubborn....

all u need it's to give both of u some more times to communicate and for her to slowly adapt to the correct way of living and thinking.

sometimes it's not good to talk to them head to head,from my past experience,its always better to talk to them by turning a big round.

[SingViet]

Originally Posted by Xgenre

Great thread. Have always been a silent reader. Just wanted to share some info, there are Singapore doctors who have a license to operate both in Singapore and Vietnam. The one I know is an on oncologist (cancer) doctor who does fly to Vietnam to treat patients. So if anyone needs a good oncologist in Vietnam, there is another option besides flying the patient to Singapore if you need good treatment.

Actually, there's a handfull of oncologists travelling between Singapore and Vietnam. There's cancer clinics started by singapore doctors in HCMC, Danang and Hanoi. There's also a liver clinic started by Singapore doctor in HCMC. But Vietnamese still prefers to come Singapore for treatment if they have the money.

[SingViet]

Originally Posted by volcano

are u just married?

many of us here have already been through this path many years already.

and many of us have already realised that Vietnamese gals are born to be stubborn....

all u need it's to give both of u some more times to communicate and for her to slowly adapt to the correct way of living and thinking.

sometimes it's not good to talk to them head to head,from my past experience,its always better to talk to them by turning a big round.

Mine after 9 years, still damm stubborn, although have changed roi. I am used to it, no use trying to say who is right or wrong as she always think she is right. If argue further, she will say i look down on her and her family. Same pattern year after year, i am used to it. Look at the her positive side seems better.

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by kingic

now my wife only like drink red bull and eat alot MSG. i really dun know how to explain how MSG and red bull no good to them now.

Red Bull NO Good .... Yes .. thats an obvious ...

MSG NO Good ... Ehhhhh .. so hard to debate .... People in VN Eat Tonnes of MSG and their life spans seems much more longer than we people in SIngapore who DON'T eat MSG ...

MSG is like part of their staple diet ... hardly can go without it ... Want to change .. take alot of time and effort ... approach is Cannot 1 time CUT ALL but reduce over time ...

My baby was born in VN and my wife stayed in VN throughout her pregnancy ... tell me about MSG ...

Just to side track:

Same for relationship ... 1 time change all Bad Habits / Cultures / Lifestyle .... NOT POSSIBLE ... It is the same if I ask you to change 1 of your bad habit .. can u change all? Can you change immediately? Can you talk/discuss peacefully ?

Remember : FATE made both of u together whether both good character or bad character or either 1 each .... It is NOT a matter of make do but be tolerant and forgiving ...

[shysaint]

Originally Posted by SingViet

Mine after 9 years, still damm stubborn, although have changed roi...Same pattern year after year, i am used to it.

Mine only after 3 years ...

ok lah , after got baby , change quite alot, thinking also change ...

BUT ...

Angry means Angry ...

Wants means Wants ...

I do want to share this observatin :

If they KNOW you are true to her, genuine, don't flirt, care about her + her family, Love her and etc ....

I strongly believe she will listen to you abd change for the better ....

Likewise if it's the opposite.

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by SingViet

Mine after 9 years, still damm stubborn, although have changed roi. I am used to it, no use trying to say who is right or wrong as she always think she is right. If argue further, she will say i look down on her and her family. Same pattern year after year, i am used to it. Look at the her positive side seems better.

I have the same mindset as yours,after years of my marriage,i also came to realised that sometime the more u argue,the more they dont listen.Previously mine always say i look down on her when we quarrel even though i dont think like that.First few years was the tougher and i slowly close one eye.

I let her talk and just dont aruge back for small things.Slowly she start to change as she also notice i change a lot for her.My thinking was as long as long as she is faithful to me and do her duty as a wife,i should close one eye and let her do her ways for minor things.Nowadays she do not bring out the topic that i look down on her and usually will listen to my explainantion.

Try not always use some words when talking to them like,you must,i want u to,why u always like that and etc cos she will fee that u are ordering her and dont respect her and think u look down on her.This are some of my past experience

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by SingViet

Mine after 9 years, still damm stubborn, although have changed roi. I am used to it, no use trying to say who is right or wrong as she always think she is right. If argue further, she will say i look down on her and her family. Same pattern year after year, i am used to it. Look at the her positive side seems better.

yes,i agree on this.Look at her postive side is really better especially after quarrel or before u start to quarrel with her.Cos u will close one eye and not be so angry.I always practise this during and after our quarrel and she also now understand and sit down and listen to me

Think of what she do for u and your family and u will slowly forget about her stubborn attitude even though u know still in them.Treasure what she do for u and just think everybody is different,just dont take it too hard on her for minor things

[jf66312]

Originally Posted by Golden question

yes,i agree on this.Look at her postive side is really better especially after quarrel or before u start to quarrel with her.Cos u will close one eye and not be so angry.I always practise this during and after our quarrel and she also now understand and sit down and listen to me

Think of what she do for u and your family and u will slowly forget about her stubborn attitude even though u know still in them.Treasure what she do for u and just think everybody is different,just dont take it too hard on her for minor things

yup..agree too...mine only about 3 years but still as stubborn too...

already learnt not to argue too much...sometimes they know its wrong but they just refuse to admit it so i normally let it rest and if they really know its wrong , they will change though mouth say they are like this...

ps - do u guys realise they never ever say sorry...hehe..

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by jf66312

yup..agree too...mine only about 3 years but still as stubborn too...

already learnt not to argue too much...sometimes they know its wrong but they just refuse to admit it so i normally let it rest and if they really know its wrong , they will change though mouth say they are like this...

ps - do u guys realise they never ever say sorry...hehe..

yes,mine will never say and now i dont expect her to say to me cos i learn to tell myself,EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT.

She will only say for normal days if she make those small mistake but for quarrel,seldom.Maybe also due to face and their stubborn blood in them

[jf66312]

Originally Posted by Golden question

yes,mine will never say and now i dont expect her to say to me cos i learn to tell myself,EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT.

She will only say for normal days if she make those small mistake but for quarrel,seldom.Maybe also due to face and their stubborn blood in them

the only time my oc say sorry is when she lost $$ in danh bai...

that was the one and only time...

[Golden question]

Originally Posted by jf66312

the only time my oc say sorry is when she lost $$ in danh bai...

that was the one and only time...

not bad man,u still can remember,i still remember during those first few years after our marriage,she will insist me to say sorry to her after our quarrel.

There was once,i was damm piss off and raise my voice and say:If U REALLY JUST WANT ME TO SAY SORRY TO U,NOW I SAY SORRY TO U,SO U HAPPY NOW.

Then she keep quiet then after that,she never demand any sorry from me again cos she know i dont like her to push me until i got no way to go.When quarrel,both party will not accept themselve to be wrong cos still angry.After cool down,then if u think on a postive side that is not that she dont like u but is just that our point of view is different,then u will talk to her or she will come and talk to u

[jf66312]

Originally Posted by Golden question

not bad man,u still can remember,i still remember during those first few years after our marriage,she will insist me to say sorry to her after our quarrel.

There was once,i was damm piss off and raise my voice and say:If U REALLY JUST WANT ME TO SAY SORRY TO U,NOW I SAY SORRY TO U,SO U HAPPY NOW.

Then she keep quiet then after that,she never demand any sorry from me again cos she know i dont like her to push me until i got no way to go.When quarrel,both party will not accept themselve to be wrong cos still angry.After cool down,then if u think on a postive side that is not that she dont like u but is just that our point of view is different,then u will talk to her or she will come and talk to u

yup..thats true..in the beginning not used to the cold war and exchange of words..

but now getting used to it liaoz...learnt more self control also...

[Honey Boon]

not only vnam spouse la.... if any man so "perfect" to any woman, and the woman still don't want to listen and change,,,,,, she is either deaf or retarded

Originally Posted by shysaint

I do want to share this observatin :

If they KNOW you are true to her, genuine, don't flirt, care about her + her family, Love her and etc ....

I strongly believe she will listen to you abd change for the better ....

Likewise if it's the opposite.

[batty]

Hi Hurricane88 and vietboy. Vietnamese, Indian, Myanmarese and Filipino medical doctors trained in their medical schools in universities in their home countries are allowed to practise in Singapore. So decrees our Ministry of Health (Singapore). Some Vietnamese doctors in Singapore can hardly speak adequate English. Just visit the local polyclinics and privatised Government hospitals. Some of their medical university degrees are from universities with questionable educational standards. I am quite sure there will be a few medical malpractice cases involving them in future. I fear that some that will cause the deaths of patients.