Jokes for Relaxing.. [new thread]

[Hurricane88]

😂 A bus full of housewives going on a picnic ,
fell into a river ,
all died .
Each husband cried for a week ,
one husband continued for more than two weeks !!!
When asked that did he miss his wife so much ?
he replied miserably :
No
My wife
missed
the bus !!!
😜😝😋😛⛄😊
In heaven God told all husbands & wives to gather for a meeting!
He told the men to stand in two queues...
Those who are controlled by their wives & those who control their wives!

Only 1 man stood in d second Queue...

God said "So you control ur wife?"

Man: "R u CRAZY ???
My wife told me to stand here"😂😂😂...

Lol😂😂😂
A Junior in office dialled his boss's extension by mistake & said:
Hey, send a coffee in my cabin in 2 min ☕
Boss Shouted: Do u know whom u r talking 2? 😡
Jr : No!
Boss: I'm the BOSS 👺
Jr (in same tone): do u know whom u r talking to?
Boss: No!
Jr : THANK GOD (& disconnected) 😃😃😃

KEEP LAUGHING !
A Chinese man married an African woman and had a child. Two months later the child passed away.
At the funeral house, the African woman kept sobbing and saying: "I KNEW IT !!! I KNEW IT !!!"
A family member pulled her aside and asked:
"What did you know?" She replied: "That, Chinese products don't last long!!"

Dont laugh alone, share with others😂😂

[Hurricane88]

🎊Breaking News.🎊
Scientists in Malaysia from UUM hve found out dat as u get older, ur balls start to hang lower n lower n dat will make it difficult for ur Penis to get hard-on.
But then one journalist asked d scientist how come some of our old politicians r marrying girls who r so much younger than them?
D scientist said dat it's bcoz so many supporters r carrying their Balls. 😛

[Hurricane88]

[warbird]

A quarter dies and goes to heaven.

On his arrival at the gates of heaven, the Lord himself welcomes him while angels play the trumpets. The quarter doesn't believe his eyes as he is being given the most beautiful cloud of all with riches and food and honey for eternity.

The next day the one-hundred-dollar bill dies.

He also rises to heaven but there doesn't appear to be anyone. He pushed the gate open by himself but behind it is nobody but one angel playing on his phone. The one-hundred-dollar bill asks for his cloud but is given a little filthy grey rainy cloud. As he tries to make himself comfortable which doesn't succeed, he sees the quarter on his right partying with all the angels at his enormous white cloud.

Upset he goes to God himself to complain. "Why does the quarter get the best cloud while I get this stormy trash? I'm more valuable, right?", asks the one-hundred-dollar bill. But God responds: yeah, but we didn't see you that much in church.

[Boeing737]

Thanks for the daily laughter

[dyelook]

laughter bumps...

[masters]

It's been months since I bought the book "How to Scam People Online".

It still hasn't arrived yet.

—————————————

My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.

I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf

[foojian]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

Good one bro!

[Masterl23]

Originally Posted by Hurricane88

This is nice, keep on sharing.

[malaysiapig]

[diputs1269]

Originally Posted by malaysiapig

So end up CIP = Come In Putin, cheers!

[entering]

I was at the coffee shop and I over heard 2 Ang mohs asking the beer girl, "how much ?" And he was pointing downwards to the bottles of cold beer in the tub, where the beer girl was standing close to.

Her reply? "Sex dollar and fifty sens..."

Wow, it's a lot cheaper than my $100 maid.

[etsys]

Random contribution

Hope it's funny

Seems some cartoons Do come true. Maybe a squirrel who fell from the roof ?

[SBMEDSUP]

Originally Posted by etsys

Random contribution

Hope it's funny

Very funny. Pls share more

[Hurricane88]

A Malaysian left his job in Malaysia and joined as a salesman in a big departmental store in Australia.

On the first day, the Malaysian worked with full vigour.

At 6 pm:

Boss :- How much of sales did you do on the first day?

Malaysian : Sir, I attended to 1 Sale.

Boss : just Only 1 sale the whole day? Usually every salesman here does 20 to 30 Sale transactions a day. Well, tell me what is the money value of your today's one sale?

Malaysian : $93300 dollars.

Boss : What! Unbelievable! But how did you do that?
Malaysian : Sir, 1 person came and I sold him a small fishing hook.
Then a mazola and then finally sold a big hook. Then I sold him 1 big fishing rod and some fishing gear.

Then I asked him where does he go to catch fish and he said in the coastal area....

Then I said it would need a boat. So I took him down to the boat department and sold him a 20 ft double engine scooner boat.

When he said the boat won't come in his Volkas Wagon, I took him to the auto mobile section and sold him the new Deluxe 4 x 4 blazer to carry the boat.
And when I asked him where he would be going fishing ??? He didn't plan anything. So I took him to the camping section and sold him a six sleeper camper tent.

And then he took groceries worth $ 200 and 2 cases of beer.

Now the boss took 2 steps back and asked :- *You sold all this to the man who came just to buy only 1 fish hook*???

Malaysian : "NO, SIR..." *He ONLY Came to Buy 1 Tablet For his Headache.... I Explained to him that Fishing is the Best Way to Get Rid of Headaches.*

Boss : Where did you work before ???

Malaysian : Yes, I was working in a private hospital in Malaysia : *On any Minor Complaint, We Get the Patients Tested for Pathology, ECO, ECG, TMT, CT SCAN, X-Ray, MRI etc*.
Boss : Will You please sit in my chair?. I shall go to Malaysia and join a Private Hospital for Training.😅😂🤣