Pause and ponder......

[Medusa]

TRUST

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and
enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB."

There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".

-----------------------------------------------------------------

NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.

This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."

The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."

The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of
the wife.

Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.

The nightmare begins.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.

Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..

----------------------------------------------------------------------

RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other,
we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party. >

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

PERSONAL PERCEPTION

Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"

Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey.

He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family.

How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."

The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey.

Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."

Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left.

Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river.

You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you.

Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..

__________________________________________________ _______________

BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States.

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck.

The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment.

When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands.

When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?"

The father went home & committed suicide. Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be
repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't.

Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient. Forgive & forget.

Love one and all.

If you judge people, you have no time to love them.

[S.B.Y]

Pak P 's Songkok off to you Sis(mbak) Medusa

Thread written to the T that is so crystal clear

Well done Sis(mbak)

[Max77]

Every points so so valuable...

I've decided to repeat once every morning to myself

[Medusa]

[Medusa]

[NewMike1304k]

Trust is a 2 way street, but you know something, it has to come from you first. My wife and I used to live apart. And she used to meet her ex once in a while. It drove me crazy even though she would tell me she was meeting him. I told her I trusted her and loved her and that she is free to meet with whichever guys she wanted. As long as she told me and she was open. I did not want to hear any words from anybody. And although I did not like it, I respected her freedom as she had a life before me and she should have a life with me and after me. In the end, she stopped seeing any other guys or going out with them, even for coffee. So like I said... It comes from you.

[alan0338]

gd posts sis.....

[see see only]

Hey

Me agree with the trust issue here

However all trust with no "caring" factor (u guys know what i mean) may not work well also.

We tighten a bit and let go the line in the right timing, in order to make our "love" kite fly higher ...

I guess this mixture or formula for the "perfect love portion" really take both pair of hands of the married couple to come out with (and as well as the kids in future)

[RealEstateGuy]

Originally Posted by Medusa

TRUST

TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and
enmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB."

There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB".

-----------------------------------------------------------------

NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.

This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."

The SDU officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."

The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of
the wife.

Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.

The nightmare begins.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

NO OVERPOWERING

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.

Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character."

It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.

It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..

----------------------------------------------------------------------

RIGHT SPEECH

There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other,
we always forget mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the other party. >

A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

PERSONAL PERCEPTION

Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?"

Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey.

He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family.

How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the donkey.

Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."

The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey.

Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."

Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice left.

Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river.

You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you.

Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.

Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..

__________________________________________________ _______________

BE PATIENT

This is a true story which happened in the States.

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck.

The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment.

When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands.

When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?"

The father went home & committed suicide. Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be
repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't.

Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.

People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.

Pause and ponder. Think before you act. Be patient. Forgive & forget.

Love one and all.

If you judge people, you have no time to love them.

this is fine but more or less applicable to "normal" girls not thai, pina, or viet or prc fl. the agenda is different. for example if viet fl ask you for money constanly, fine just pay and ignore her shortcomings? not real bra. not the way to deal with these gals.

[fullofrubbish]

Well said sis Medusa .

[Medusa]

Originally Posted by RealEstateGuy

this is fine but more or less applicable to "normal" girls not thai, pina, or viet or prc fl. the agenda is different. for example if viet fl ask you for money constanly, fine just pay and ignore her shortcomings? not real bra. not the way to deal with these gals.

hmmm bro RealEstateGuy....i think you think too much le....firstly i didnt stated in any part of the article that this is meant for what kind of girls, nor did i ask any bros here to use this on any kind of girls...this is just an article....its suppose to be use on the person you love and whom love you...all those commercial "love" are not included....reading it in a simple manner may be better than reading and making it complicated

[see see only]

Originally Posted by Medusa

TRUST

NO POINTING FINGERS

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.

This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.

If we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.

Huh ... this one me not so much agree la

So they will never learn from mistake and after another mistake then another mistake ... mistakes will never stop

Becuase they will take for granted all mistakes will be forgiven

[S.B.Y]

Originally Posted by RealEstateGuy

this is fine but more or less applicable to "normal" girls not thai, pina, or viet or prc fl. the agenda is different. for example if viet fl ask you for money constanly, fine just pay and ignore her shortcomings? not real bra. not the way to deal with these gals.

Quote:
Originally Posted by S.B.Y
Halo Mas RealEstateGuy

Is there some typo error here hmmmm

Quote:
Originally Posted by RealEstateGuy
Bra, you are dealing with a situation where engagement will only cause you to further spiral down. Your best bet (only wise one) is to disengage completely. The woman cheat on her husband. If that enough of a red flag men are just a means to her goals for you? Why are you so stupid? No offense, we are trying to help. Stay away from her bra.

Mas RealEstateGuy

Is Bra Icelandic translation for Bro

On the contrary TS, Pak P would definitely NOT want to stay away from her BRA

[Medusa]

Pak P...thats really an indepth analysis from you hahaha...i'm taken aback...but i guess it will only take a wise man to recognise another you sure your message will get across correctly?

anyway i'm sure not only you, Pak P, the others wouldnt want to leave her Bra either

[tommy29sg]

We become wiser whenever we read anything on all these... we know what is right and what is wrong...

however, saying it is always easy and doing it is difficult...

but most important of all, don't stop to follow it... because we will lose it...