Friendship not Sex

Kenzaro · #1 20-04-2012, 05:13 AM

Hey guys,

I join sammyboy like very long ago liao reading forums and some threads really make sense

My whole life I've never cheated in my relationship before and I think maybe my divorce was just due to my own fault.

12 years ago I met a girl and we got married a year later and then got our own kids (a girl and a boy). I work and work so hard until I own my own retail outlet and going to start another shop at city square mall.

Suddenly! My ex wife told me we're just not suitable to be together... ...at first I thought she had found another guy (guys usually think like that I think) that's why she wanted to divorce with me. She just told me that she wants to go clubbing and have fun and that with me around it's hard for her to do that and she got married too early.

Now we've already divorced and I've given her all rights to both our child. Every month I'm paying her $1000 maintainance for her and 2 kids.

She could settle down 12 years ago and go take the wedding vows together with me but regret it later so how to believe people any more?

I don't think I'll fall in love anymore so I want to join you guys and to make more friends.

During these few years with her I practically only have 1 friend and nobody else. She always makes a fuss if a guy or girl talks to me so I stop contacting them (bad ideal) years ago

So sick of my life when all of a sudden want to talk to somebody also that difficult. But thanks all for reading it. It really takes the pressure I'm feeling right off my chest.

magixballx · #2 20-04-2012, 06:46 AM

its sad to hear such a thing take care ya, its not the end of the world yet, you still have got people around in this forum to make friends with to have fun just cheer up

JackieTan · #3 20-04-2012, 06:48 AM

Hope u get better.

Poet · #4 20-04-2012, 06:51 AM

Things can only get better. Take care.

Kenzaro · #5 20-04-2012, 07:41 AM

I think it's because we were young and had never really played around like clubbing, drinking and stuff like that that's why I don't really blame her for making such a decision.

The only thing that's bothering me is why am I not sad and still can go sammyboy talk cock... ...

weird huh

andythai · #6 20-04-2012, 09:01 AM

bro hope you can made some new friends and have a new life

DIDI · #7 20-04-2012, 09:20 AM

TS look ahead !!! all the best!

SinDellman · #8 20-04-2012, 09:47 AM

Brother, there is still a long road for you in front. Enjoy life to the fullest. You must let go the past if you want to do that. Be happy everyday!

BEAT · #9 20-04-2012, 09:58 AM

I am still single and have no GF, bro this is not end of the world, life still need to go on man. I am sure this forum can make friend aleast if make you feel better.

owl888 · #10 20-04-2012, 10:21 AM

TS u have already delivered 2 kids which is good. Now u can anyhow use your sperm without worrying being wasted.........so many sections to make friends in SBF, e.g KTV, swinging, ....etc.

Unicornfan · #11 20-04-2012, 10:41 AM

Bro, look forward, it is not the end of the world. I married early too n too with 2 kiddos. I am not experiencing what you went thru though.

Seems like you are taking it well and make more friends, I believe apart from getting a better life ahead, you might make friends here in the forum. The old timers here can give good advice when called upon.

All the best!

simple2kee · #12 20-04-2012, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kenzaro

The only thing that's bothering me is why am I not sad and still can go sammyboy talk cock... ...

who knows better than u r?

alan0338 · #13 20-04-2012, 10:57 AM

time to spend $$$ liao ....

Kenzaro · #14 20-04-2012, 11:05 AM

Ya I feel more lost then sad you see.

During these 12 years my life was like work & work. Go home play with kids. I go pug once a few years I realise. I meet my friends when fate brings us together on the streets. My ex use metal chain lock me sia.

I just felt wasted and finally awoke. It's dumb getting married at 19. It's stupid to believe a girl 17 telling me she love me and want to get married with me. I'm so gullible at the fact I believed her.

Divorce wasn't the worst thing. It's after divorce you don't have a friend to talk to. But after looking at all the encouragements I don't think I'll be lonely in here.

Just to ask any sites other then this adult friend finder I can get to know more girls?

Ken

2centsworth · #15 20-04-2012, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kenzaro

Just to ask any sites other then this adult friend finder I can get to know more girls?

Besides quantity of people to talk to, quality is also important. It's harder to find people who are sensible and talk sense in some places. Why not join an activity you like and make friends? Do you have things you always wish to do but could never find time or permission to do it while you are married?

Are the kids still living with you? Sounds like she has the custody of the kids and $1000 monthly. You aren't having sex with her anymore right? Why must a divorce happen before she can go clubbing and try to regain her lost youth?

You should have suggested that both of you stay married but allow each other to lead separate lives. She can have all the fun she want, bed all the men she want and you won't be bothered. If she eventually find a new man, you can backdate the divorce to help her marry her new man faster. In both scenarios, you aren't getting sex from her anyway but in the 2nd scenario, your kids will continue to live with you and you do not need to pay $1000 monthly for maintenance. Your kids will grow up in a more normal family than now.

Losing a marriage hurts but not being able to be there with your kids while they are growing up will hurt even more. Stay strong bro.