Marriage issues revisited

[zomgbaby]

Yes, as per above I have encountered some issues with my wife. I am going through a sex deprived marriage like many did. The problem is, we are married for less than a year. We did have sexual encounters on and off before our marriage for the past few years and every single time it was great. Around 1 year prior to the wedding she requested for hiatus and her reason was she did not want any "accident" to happen. I though she was right and fair so I obliged.

We did not "consummate" on our wedding night as I was semi KO'ed by the liquor when we reach the suite. The next day we had to check out by noon so there was no chance for anything kinky to happen. The same night nothing happened as both of us were still exhausted. The following night I initiated but was shrug off by her "I'm still feeling very tired, can we do it another day?" So I thought why not give her another few days of rest before I try again. I did not ask again till almost two weeks later and was again shrug off by the ever familiar reason "i don't feel like". I didn't say anything and turned towards the opposite direction and fell asleep shortly.

After weeks of facing her rejections, I brought up the topic of sex deprived marriage to her. The conversation didn't last more than 5 minutes and ended up pretty nasty. During the conversation I brought up to her the potential issues of a sexless marriage. It was pretty clear that the message not only did not get through but at the same time backfired. She said that I not being understanding and demanding. I then asked her "if I don't turn to you for sex, who should I turn to?" She kept quiet and the conversation ended.

We did not have sex till 3 months later and it ended within 10 minutes. There was almost no foreplay, just touch, pump then cum. To be honest, I couldn't feel any love from her. And then the same thing happened again whenever I try to initiate, the SOP Reasons "I don't feel like, feeling tired etc". My frustrations grew strong as the days went by. When I could no longer hold back my frustrations, I confronted her. She then told me that she's no longer interested with sex but wouldn't mind if we are planning for children. At that moment my mind went blank. Completely blank. Mind you, both of us are only in our late twenties and she has already lost her sex drive. To make things worse, she's a looker and when we are out, married men never fail to lay their eyes on her. In the eyes of those envious men, they must have thought how lucky I am. But the truth is, I am suffering.

Till date I have yet ate outside although the thought has crossed my mind countless times. Partially also due to the fact that some of our relatives have divorced due to cheating/3rd party.

I know there are already such threads but I thought it would be great that I could share my own and have others reflect that there are "worser" scenarios. Feel free to share your opinions. Any tips to remedy my situation is very much welcomed.

[muscleboi]

bro, i feel for you. signing the contract thinking all's well and sex will be as great but...

why not give her surprise sex? but before that, make her feel very comfortable by creating ambience and stuffs. find out the reason why she's not intersted in sex anymore through observation. no woman want to be treated as a sex object. so you confronting her may sound like the right thing to do...but indeed, it may have made matters worse..all i can say is try all the tricks you can and if nothing works...i wish you the best...

[LengKia]

Originally Posted by muscleboi

bro, i feel for you. signing the contract thinking all's well and sex will be as great but...

why not give her surprise sex? but before that, make her feel very comfortable by creating ambience and stuffs. find out the reason why she's not intersted in sex anymore through observation. no woman want to be treated as a sex object. so you confronting her may sound like the right thing to do...but indeed, it may have made matters worse..all i can say is try all the tricks you can and if nothing works...i wish you the best...

my friend has no sex with his wife for 3.5 years

[zomgbaby]

Originally Posted by muscleboi

bro, i feel for you. signing the contract thinking all's well and sex will be as great but...

why not give her surprise sex? but before that, make her feel very comfortable by creating ambience and stuffs. find out the reason why she's not intersted in sex anymore through observation. no woman want to be treated as a sex object. so you confronting her may sound like the right thing to do...but indeed, it may have made matters worse..all i can say is try all the tricks you can and if nothing works...i wish you the best...

Hi muscleboi, thanks for your contribution. Surprise sex, body massage, shower her with gifts, I've tried it all. I have fulfilled my role as husband be it emotionally or physically and have always respected her decisions. Her reason is she has lost interest in sex. I am lost.

[wells]

always work, dinner, watch TV then sleep. See u or her everyday also sian.

I also married, sometimes got to plan for a getaway to refresh or recharge both of you and it works for me.

Join more activity, gathering, bring her shopping, give her surprise gift, importantly maintain the flames of love.

[zomgbaby]

Originally Posted by wells

always work, dinner, watch TV then sleep. See u or her everyday also sian.

I also married, sometimes got to plan for a getaway to refresh or recharge both of you and it works for me.

Join more activity, gathering, bring her shopping, give her surprise gift, importantly maintain the flames of love.

Hi wells, thank you for your input. I agree with you that things get bland with the usual daily routine. I have done all the activities as you advised but to no avail. Come to think of it I think its much more than just sex. I hardly get any form of affection from her as well.

[zomgbaby]

Originally Posted by muscleboi

bro, i feel for you. signing the contract thinking all's well and sex will be as great but...

why not give her surprise sex? but before that, make her feel very comfortable by creating ambience and stuffs. find out the reason why she's not intersted in sex anymore through observation. no woman want to be treated as a sex object. so you confronting her may sound like the right thing to do...but indeed, it may have made matters worse..all i can say is try all the tricks you can and if nothing works...i wish you the best...

HI Muscleboi, thank you for your suggestions. I did try surprise sex, body massage etc but it didn't work out too. I had to confront her because she has been avoiding the topic for past few months. I was desperate for an answer for what is happening between us. Her only answer was that she had lost interest in sex. I have always respect her preferences and never had once crossed the line. All i can hope for now is that someday she would change.

[tanhockgin]

Hey Bro,

Same shit is happening to me.

At least yours does not involve kids. We dun even sleep on the same bed anymore and we are living just for the kids. Hate it. No life, no future!

Be prepared for the worse. As you cant change her nor do you want her to change you, seek an anullment. Not sure if that is still valid. If not, go your own way.

Then never ink a contract again till you are damn sure the next person is THE ONE.

Hard cold reality.

[jnudes]

Originally Posted by zomgbaby

Yes, as per above I have encountered some issues with my wife. I am going through a sex deprived marriage like many did. The problem is, we are married for less than a year. We did have sexual encounters on and off before our marriage for the past few years and every single time it was great. Around 1 year prior to the wedding she requested for hiatus and her reason was she did not want any "accident" to happen. I though she was right and fair so I obliged.

We did not "consummate" on our wedding night as I was semi KO'ed by the liquor when we reach the suite. The next day we had to check out by noon so there was no chance for anything kinky to happen. The same night nothing happened as both of us were still exhausted. The following night I initiated but was shrug off by her "I'm still feeling very tired, can we do it another day?" So I thought why not give her another few days of rest before I try again. I did not ask again till almost two weeks later and was again shrug off by the ever familiar reason "i don't feel like". I didn't say anything and turned towards the opposite direction and fell asleep shortly.

After weeks of facing her rejections, I brought up the topic of sex deprived marriage to her. The conversation didn't last more than 5 minutes and ended up pretty nasty. During the conversation I brought up to her the potential issues of a sexless marriage. It was pretty clear that the message not only did not get through but at the same time backfired. She said that I not being understanding and demanding. I then asked her "if I don't turn to you for sex, who should I turn to?" She kept quiet and the conversation ended.

We did not have sex till 3 months later and it ended within 10 minutes. There was almost no foreplay, just touch, pump then cum. To be honest, I couldn't feel any love from her. And then the same thing happened again whenever I try to initiate, the SOP Reasons "I don't feel like, feeling tired etc". My frustrations grew strong as the days went by. When I could no longer hold back my frustrations, I confronted her. She then told me that she's no longer interested with sex but wouldn't mind if we are planning for children. At that moment my mind went blank. Completely blank. Mind you, both of us are only in our late twenties and she has already lost her sex drive. To make things worse, she's a looker and when we are out, married men never fail to lay their eyes on her. In the eyes of those envious men, they must have thought how lucky I am. But the truth is, I am suffering.

Till date I have yet ate outside although the thought has crossed my mind countless times. Partially also due to the fact that some of our relatives have divorced due to cheating/3rd party.

I know there are already such threads but I thought it would be great that I could share my own and have others reflect that there are "worser" scenarios. Feel free to share your opinions. Any tips to remedy my situation is very much welcomed.

Someone I know is handsome and married a beautiful wife. Many people will think he is one lucky man. But one thing that surprises me is he still flirts with a woman that looks uglier than her current wife. Even the wife was complaining and asks why.

We the horny guys want to get laid with beautiful ladies all the times. But how many of this beautiful women can really perform and service oriented with high GFE? I am referring to the working ladies at the spa center that offers FJ. Very rare. Most of the times complain of poor attitude, waste of money, this cannot and that cannot, rushed service, etc.

bro, I feel sorry sex was lacking in your marriage. Your story just reminded me just because the woman is good looking it does not mean she loves sex and can perform well in bed although in real life she might be a very good dresser to show off to the public. i believe she is only interested to make love for the sake of getting pregnant and not for sexual pleasure.

[muscleboi]

Originally Posted by zomgbaby

HI Muscleboi, thank you for your suggestions. I did try surprise sex, body massage etc but it didn't work out too. I had to confront her because she has been avoiding the topic for past few months. I was desperate for an answer for what is happening between us. Her only answer was that she had lost interest in sex. I have always respect her preferences and never had once crossed the line. All i can hope for now is that someday she would change.

I know, bro. use aphrodisiac. got orthodox ones and unorthodox ones. you choose. you will know what's best..

glad you didnt cross the line. keep it up. but remember you didnt marry to be a monk. there're too many "maybe"s in the world..."maybe after having a kid, she will become horny again." "maybe after she reaches 30s, her hormones can make her want more sex." ..whether to take the risk, its up to you.

i always think its good to discuss all forms of commitment including sex before marriage..but then again, change is the only constant. who knows things will change for the better? mindset must stay positive since you're already in the contract.

[muscleboi]

Originally Posted by jnudes

Someone I know is handsome and married a beautiful wife. Many people will think he is one lucky man. But one thing that surprises me is he still flirts with a woman that looks uglier than her current wife. Even the wife was complaining and asks why.

We the horny guys want to get laid with beautiful ladies all the times. But how many of this beautiful women can really perform and service oriented with high GFE? I am referring to the working ladies at the spa center that offers FJ. Very rare. Most of the times complain of poor attitude, waste of money, this cannot and that cannot, rushed service, etc.

bro, I feel sorry sex was lacking in your marriage. Your story just reminded me just because the woman is good looking it does not mean she loves sex and can perform well in bed although in real life she might be a very good dresser to show off to the public. i believe she is only interested to make love for the sake of getting pregnant and not for sexual pleasure.

bro i agree. my ex is not a looker but she's willing to please. i was the dumb dumb goody two shoes guy back then who refused to try out-of-the-world stuffs. though she left me, i have changed for the better.

[Fade]

Hi there TS. Some years back I faced the same issue as you and till now the problem still exist but I have come to accept it.

Thanks to the Internet, I came across this term 'Passive Agreesive' and all of a sudden the mystery has been solved for my sexless marriage. I m slowly working my way out with my partner and it's a challenging path for us to take.
Do take some time and read thru this link and hope you will find it useful.

http://www.experienceproject.com/sto...rriage/1445968

[maotaicat]

Originally Posted by Fade

Hi there TS. Some years back I faced the same issue as you and till now the problem still exist but I have come to accept it.

Thanks to the Internet, I came across this term 'Passive Agreesive' and all of a sudden the mystery has been solved for my sexless marriage. I m slowly working my way out with my partner and it's a challenging path for us to take.
Do take some time and read thru this link and hope you will find it useful.

http://www.experienceproject.com/sto...rriage/1445968

Thanks FADE for this piece of important information. I realized that I am actually
dealing with people having such character.

[consultant]

Bro, I believe your prob quite serious.Only professional counseling might work IMHO as, like u said u hv tried many ways already.

[jasdude]

Originally Posted by zomgbaby

Any tips to remedy my situation is very much welcomed.

Women are from Venus and Men from Mars. Men are physically and visually enhanced and Women more psychologically and emotionally enhanced. Please seek professional help immediately with doctors and counselors.