Wedding loans taken by Malay couples contributing to divorce rates

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Singapore - It took him three years to save $10,000 for his wedding ceremony in 2007.

But his final bill was $25,500.

Then, for more than two years, Hafiz (not his real name) tried to settle the debt, using his $2,500 monthly salary.

The technician's parents eventually had to help him with his payments.

Financial troubles, like Hafiz's, have contributed to a breakdown of marriages in the Malay-Muslim community.

That troubled the Government enough for the Ministry of Social and Family Development to revamp a marriage preparation course for the community.

Last month, Dr Yaacob Ibrahim, Minister- in-charge of Muslim Affairs, said the course will include financial planning.

Hafiz, 36, wished he had someone to check with before going ahead with his grand wedding.

He said he wanted to make his wife happy.

He said: "Before our wedding, she went to a few of our friends' to get some ideas.

"She told me that she wanted ours to be bigger and grander than the others.

And I agreed with her out of love."

But he couldn't pay. So he had to take a bank loan of $10,000. Then he borrowed about $5,000 more from his relatives to hold the wedding at the void deck of his flat in Tampines.

He said with a chuckle: "Malays say that to be a bridegroom is similar to being a king for a day.

"But apparently, for me, being a 'king' turned out to be a very expensive affair."

Mr Hafiz said his sales assistant wife earns about $1,500 a month.

Pricey

The decoration at his wedding alone cost him thousands of dollars.

He recalled that for his wedding, the ceiling and pillars of the void deck were covered with fabric.

Coloured cloth was also used to cover the chairs and tables, which were topped with fresh flowers.

"The void deck looked like a hotel function room. It was very beautiful.

But it cost me close to $10,000 just for the decoration alone.

"In the end, my parents, who just received their CPF payouts, had to help me pay off my wedding debts," he said.

Hafiz has a 30-year-old sister who is single.

"She has a fiance and they intend to get married soon. But they told me that they will try to make their ceremony as simple as possible.

"My sister and her husband-to-be said that they will just have a small gathering for the 'akad nikah' (solemnisation), and that's it. Maybe that's a good idea after all I've been through," he said with a laugh.

Now that his debts are out of the way, he intends to start a family with his wife and buy a flat together.

Said Hafiz: "I don't have to worry about my debts any more and can move forward with my married life.

"Perhaps my wife and I should have thought things over before we went all out for our wedding."


Help with managing finances

Cinta Abadi (Malay for Eternal Love), the Ministry of Social and Family Development-run course for the Malay-Muslim community, is targeting more than 2,000 soon-to-wed couples each year.

Financial education will be an integral part of the course, The Straits Times reported.

In announcing the course, Dr Yaacob Ibrahim, Minister-in- charge of Muslim Affairs, said young Muslim families need to better understand the importance of help with managing finances managing their finances.

Dr Yaacob had said that it is important for couples to live within their means.

"It's nice that you're falling in love and having a family, but ultimately you need to deal with the finances," he said.

Singapore - Wedding planners said it is common for couples to try to outdo each other.

Ms Maria Jaffar, owner of MJ Wedding, said couples even take loans to hold grand ceremonies.

Some struggle later to repay their debts.

Ms Maria has been in the industry for more than 10 years and organises weddings almost every weekend - except during the fasting month.

She said that even though most of her clients promptly settle their payments, about five every year fail to do so.

She said: "Some still owe me money after the wedding and they would come up with all kinds of excuses not to pay me.

"I still wish them all the best and will not pursue them any further for their payment. Every year, I write off more than $10,000 in bad debts."

Ms Mimie Addam, who owns Tamara Bridal, insists that couples settle all their payments one week before their wedding day.

Ms Mimie, who is in her 40s and has been running her company for seven years, advises couples to save before their big day and spend within their means.

She said: "I've arranged ceremonies that cost as low as $6,000 and I've also helped plan some that cost about $50,000."

Ms Maria said: "I have this advice for couples - be prepared to make heavy losses when you hold a wedding.

"There is no way you can recuperate your expenses from your wedding 'hongbao'."


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